Aches & Pains

Maaaa baaaaaaack huuuuurttts!

I think it must be from big fat Pooter not being able to walk and me having to schlep him around everywhere for the last week. That fatty weighs 32 pounds and I think when he's crippled he weighs even more than that. His doctor said he needs to go on a diet and eat green beans, but I told her the only way Fatty McFatsalot would eat green beans is if they were swimming in butter and came with a side of meatloaf and gravy.



So now I'm doing the pathetic hunched over hand on hip hump around the house and even then only falling out of my chair or rolling out bed for necessities like coffee and cookies. Hmmm, maybe I need to go on a green bean diet. Anyway, lets talk about something else.

I can't find a job. I know I have only been looking for a few days, but all the jobs I find are dumb. I do NOT want to work retail unless I own the store and the odds of me owning a major retail chain are slim. I do NOT want to work in the food industry because the only thing I like about food is eating it. I do NOT want to work with old people because so far all the jobs I've found with the seniors involves washing them and I really don't want a career that involves washing strangers. Does anyone know if you get paid to be a Nielson? You know, the Nielsons who rate t.v shows. I'll tell you whose job I would LOVE to have and that's Judge Judy. The only thing is there's already a Judge Marilyn. I think she comes on between Judy and Joe (not that I watch those shows.) I would want to judge regular people though. Like say you got in a fight with your neighbor because their dog keeps getting in your garbage. Or your Mother in law is always criticizing your cooking and you just want her to shut her trap. That kind of judge. A "real people" court. OMG... I've got it! I could get a show and call it "Trailer Court!" This is a perfect way to use my newly acquired Park Management degree! Sometimes I wonder how a smarty like me remains unemployed. I need someone to run this by.... Maybe I should call the channel that has all those little people big family shows.

Maaaa baaaaaaack huuuuurttts!

Look what Wyatt made last night.



I think I'm going to open an Etsy store and call it Sh!t My Kid makes. Who knows, maybe he'll make enough money to pay his own way through tech school.